nimitzbrood (nimitzbrood) wrote,

When is it enough?

April 30, 2008 11:08 AM

Why is it that no matter how much you do for people they will still cause you problems if you don’t “fit in”? Why is it that being “different” means a constant stream of problems from the “average” person?

I really don’t know but it’s starting to get to me.

I’m different. I think differently. My mind works differently than most.

This gives me great abilities in some areas but great disadvantages in others.

One disadvantage that I’m constantly revisiting is dealing with people on a personal level. No matter how careful I am, no matter how well thought out my responses, no matter how polite I think I’m being, there is almost always someone who treats me like I took a dump in their breakfast cereal.

The average person has several issues that cause me problems.

1) They can’t handle the blunt truth. Everything must be sugar coated. It doesn’t matter if the truth is right or wrong with regards to the subject at hand only that they “feel good” about the situation.

2) Body language and posturing is more important than the words used. It doesn’t matter that you’re telling a person how to save billions of dollars or something that they need to learn from you. If they don’t like your looks or your posture or you accidentally make the wrong gesture all your words will fall on deaf ears even if they were the one to come to you for the information.

3) No one can ever be forceful about something if they disagree with you. Period. From what I can see the average person wants no conflict in their lives and if you disagree with them you best tell them in the quietest way possible. (See point number 1 again.)

4) What they want is ALWAYS more important than what you want. Period. I haven’t met a person yet that this didn’t apply to. I’m not immune from this myself either I just try and mitigate it so people will leave me alone. The average person instead would keep pushing until they get what they want until you produce it OR they are convinced it’s not possible.

5) Emotion is more important than words. You can deliver positive news and because you’re tired or because you are a little angry or irritated the average person will take it as an attack. And then if you apologize they often expect you to compensate them in some manner like being extra-polite to them for the next unspecified period of time. If you would ask them to do the same they often wouldn’t.

Some people say I have Asperger’s syndrome. I’ve said that myself at other times though I’ve never been formally diagnosed with anything. They say that I’m “broken” that I act “wrong”.

The problem with this is that in my mind the average person is the one that is broken. I mean look at the above list. Who in their right mind needs to play those games when dealing with people? Why would they want to do that? Why would you waste the time doing those things when there are so many other interesting things to do in the universe?

I’d much rather just get things done and move on to other things than have to do what is effectively an acting role just to communicate with people. So much is confused by adding emotion to communication. We have thousands of words describing emotions but no one seems to use them when it matters. They put the emotion into the communication rather than communicating about the emotion.

This only confuses things. But like most things on this planet it’s unlikely to change any time soon...
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