I can't help thinking that if anybody was running a betting pool on who in the office was "next" my name would be at the top of the list. Intellectually I understand that's not the case but internally I have a small alarm bell constantly ringing - and getting louder with each passing day. I've got to do something about this - I can't end up like the rest of my family. I just can't.
There are a lot of things that I need to do. I need to uncover the treadmill again and start walking each day. I need to make sure the house is clean. I need solitude time to reduce my stress and help reduce my stress eating. Like I said I need to do a lot of things.
I'm currently sitting in a restaurant because I just wanted something better than just fast food. I had a stir-fry pita and fries. I probably should have ordered something better than a Coke to drink with it.
My wife just called as I was writing this asking if I wanted to have dinner at her sister's tonight - home made pizza. I am suddenly not in the mood for that. I think my decision to eat the pita rather than a burger is where I need to start looking at this from. I need to start there and work my way along. My wife wants me to call her and let her know. I think I'm going to say no then go home and eat some green peppers and maybe some homemade stir-fry. I need to start somewhere and I like Asian food which is much healthier in general than the standard American fare. I won't say it's a start because I've said that far too often. I think I will say "It's the beginning." because I need to stick to it from now on. No fail. No fear. No quitting.